it's funny how life happens

I am visiting friends from college this week and it has been a lot of fun so far. Today, Lori, Heather, and I went to lunch and spent about 15 minutes eating and the next 3 hours just talking.

I have a goal not to spend a lot of time focusing on all of my regrets. Heaven knows I have about a billion. I meant it when I said that my goal was not to spend a lot of time focusing on my regrets, but to not have any regrets at all is beyond the scope of my OCD so here goes: One of the biggest regrets I have in my life is not staying in touch with my friends better. I have moved so many times and then when I got married I feel like I dropped off of the face of the planet and just as I started to make good friends, we moved. And then we moved again. I have a tendency to just "disappear." I think that I have gotten a lot better at this such that I don't think I have done it lately. At least not on purpose. Not changing my phone number in almost 3 years is a good start I would say.

When my Grandma passed away, I learned a lot from going to her viewing/funeral. There were so many people at both-- I didn't realize Duchesne County even had that many people in it! It was awesome to see how many people she had touched, served, or maybe just knew enough that they came to pay their respects. It was a big slap in the face to me because I realized that if I continued the relationships in my life the way I had thus far, my funeral would be a lonely place. I know, it's kind of morbid to live your life so that you have a good turn out at your funeral- but if it works, it works.

Long story short, I'm determined to take advantage of this break from working to visit and reconnect with friends again.
So far so good.

Back to lunch today: I will say that sitting around the table, I would never have guessed 6 years ago when we started college that we'd be where we are. If that makes sense. In the same moment, I can't imagine my life any different. I married the man I knew I wanted to be with since I was 16-- even if it took us both a few years to come around to it. AND, I have an awesome relationship with my parents. On this day 7, 6,5, or even 4 years ago, if someone had told me that I would have both of those things- I would not have believed them. At all. I would have crossed-my-fingers-hoped-to-die that it was true, but still not believed it.

So yes, I have my regrets, but right now, I am grateful for all of the decisions that I regret because if hadn't made them, I may not be where I am, and I kinda like it here.